Comings&Goings

I've had an ache that comes and goes, the comings becoming longer and the goings shorter as time has progressed since 2006. After spending the first 25 years of my life in California, I reached a point where I simply. needed. out (!) as I realized more and more that this wasn't where I wanted to be or spend the rest of my life.

One thing I knew: I couldn't leave California just to not be there; there had to be a destination and a reason beyond a negated negative. I don't leave college and simply stop at being done with school; I move into the work world. To go somewhere is rooted in positivity, even if that means I'm done with here.

As I thought and prayed about this transition from time to time thru early 2008, I knew it wasn't time and that I was to stay in LA for the time being. Looking back, I'm still not positive why (and things like that often make more sense further down the road anyway), but I do know that some of the decisions I'm making now require more gumption and tenacity than I've ever had up to this point.

Flip the calendar to April of this year, when the cabin fever was reaching relentless. I was having a conversation with some very dear friends about this desire to move, and things were put into perspective.

It is OK to move because I simply want to move.

God's purposes for our lives can take hold of us anywhere we are if we're truly seeking Him.

Sometimes it's just time.

And during that conversation I realized that it was. So I booked 4 separate flights within the next week and left shortly afterward to find a destination.

I visited several places I hadn't been before, diverse, different cities that ran the gamut from small town to sun-blocked-out-by-buildings metropolis. In this I got a better sense of America, seeing the diversity in landscape and culture for what it really is: huge. I made my way through New York, Boston, Charlotte, Greenville (South Carolina), and Nashville in 10 days--just enough time to get a decent feel of each--before coming back to LA.

Nashville completely stuck with me...city-meets-small-town, affordable housing, creative environment, friendly people, seasons, laid-back atmosphere (I don't think the Joneses even live there). I have a crush on that city. When I got home, I couldn't shake it.

So come mid-October, I'll be packing all that I can fit in my car and driving 2,000 miles to Nashville, Tennessee to begin the next phase of my life. I am extremely excited and chomping at the bit, waiting to finish this transition and begin to build again.

Could I have decided to stay in California? Yes. In praying about this decision, God never said I have to go to one place or another, though I believe he does that sometimes. But he made it apparent that I could make a decision and run with it.

So I've chosen to move along and head somewhere where I want to be (uncomfortable as the transition may be), to keep dreaming and see what all this brings.